angers

Started on another book(yay! can add to the list); Prison Break (Mark Conner) and found this interesting topic in chapter three about anger. By the way, this book is about finding personal freedom from common problems such as anger, fear, worry, rejection, depression, addictions, and spiritual bondages.

Funny how someone gave this book to his prisoner friend BUT this book never made it to the prisoner. Probably the guards thought it was a handbook of how to escape from prison! :p

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires. 

James 1:19-21

James shares three important keys to great relationships.
1. we need to become good listeners
2. we have to think before we open our mouth and speak
3. we need to learn to control our anger.

Human relationships are an essential part of all of our lives. They are where we experience some of our greatest joys. They are also where we sometimes experience our deepest pain. Some of that pain can be caused by uncontrolled anger.

Few general observations about anger

• we need to recognize that anger is a common emotion - like most of our emotions, anger is a warning signal that some sort of violation has taken place. We need to pay attention to it. We need to choose wisely what we do in response to our feelings of anger.
• it can cause great damage. - it is like a boomerang. We become angry at someone else but our anger affects us too.
• anger management is essential for healthy relationships. - Its important that we take control of this emotion of anger and ensure that it does not destroy people around about us. 
• there's a big difference between having angry feelings and expressing angry behaviour. - it is one thing to feel angry. It is yet another thing to then vent that anger through behaviours that hurts people.

There is a place for righteous anger. God expresses anger at times. God's anger is never irrational or as a result of impatience. His anger only last for a moment and it is always an expression of His goodness and concern. However, when God is angry, it is always for our good and so that we will return to Him. There is a big difference between angry feelings and behaviour and there is an appropriate place for righteous anger.

So how do we take control of our anger?

1.  anger triggers - look at your life and your relationships and consider what causes you to become angry. What kind of people tend to make you angry? By reflecting on our anger triggers we can seek God's help to change our responses in those particulars situations. 
2. embrace realistic expectations about life and people. - Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. 
3. choose to be a forgiving person. - forgiveness is God's antidote to all hurt. It enables us to release the person and in releasing them, we release ourselves. 

*note: me blogging about this doesn't mean that I'm without anger. It's how I found it relevant for everyone, including me. (: