To live without limits...

To live without limits...these are needed..

• A powerful sense of purpose
• Hope so strong that is cannot be diminished
• Faith in God and the infinite possibilities
• Love and self acceptance
• A courageous spirit
• Willingness to change
• A trusting heart
• Hunger for opportunities
• The ability to assess risk and to laugh at life
• A mission to serve others first

*Life Without Limits by Nick Vujicic 

L.O.V.E

There are five positive facts about love and nine facts which shows how love does not behave.

The positive facts are that love :

• suffers long
• is kind
• rejoices in the truth
• bears all
• believes all

On the other hand, love :

• does not envy
• does not parade itself
• is not puffed up
• is not rude
• is not self-serving
• is not easily provoked
• thinks no evil
• doesn't rejoice in iniquity
• never fails

getaway

The past three mornings was filled with affirmations, encouragements and building each other. Three day fast and prayer at 5.30am isn't something that everyone looks forward to but once you made that decision to go, and your spirit man is stronger than the flesh, the spirit man wins. *ohyeah. 

Short message was shared for the three days. 

1. Remembering God (1Kings 1:29)

2. Building the Spirit man (Romans 7:14-20)

3. Make good decisions in life based on God's law. (Psalm 1, James 1:13)

Truly blessed by the three days serving and receiving at the same time. Its amazing how God works and speaks into my life through various people, even those who doesn't know what is going on.

Finally, baked a blueberry cheese cake for the first time, and a success! :D

Looking forward to an all girls trip!

don't u just wanna be there? ;)

back in action

So an aunty gave me her oven cause someone gave her one. This will work for the time being. I MISS BAKING SO, SO, SO, SO MUCH! Fingers are itching. Recipes to try are piling up. Leftover ingredients are probably rotting away or expiring soon.

Chocolate peanut butter cuppies

 Blueberry cheese cake

Oreo Cheesecake

Yeps, these are the very few that are on my list, not including roast and other stuffs that I wanna try.

Here's to baking once again! (and making everyone around me fat.)

The Vow

the "awwwww' moment in the movie..

"No matter what challenges might carry us apart, 

we will always find a way back to each other."

Why men are never depressed

Women are twice as likely to get depressed as men. There are a lot of theories about why this is the case. Here's a humorous explanation as to why men are never depressed. *justforfun!

• The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades
• Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat
• Car mechanics tell you the truth
• Same work, more pay
• Wedding dress $5000, tux rental $100
• One mood all the time
• A five holiday requires only one suitcase
• You can open all of your own jars
• You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
• If someone forgets to invite you, he/she can still be your friend
• Your underwear is $8.95 for a pack of three
• You don't have to stop and think which way to turn a nut on a bolt
• You can do your nails with a pocket knife
• You can do your Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24th in 25 minutes.

angers

Started on another book(yay! can add to the list); Prison Break (Mark Conner) and found this interesting topic in chapter three about anger. By the way, this book is about finding personal freedom from common problems such as anger, fear, worry, rejection, depression, addictions, and spiritual bondages.

Funny how someone gave this book to his prisoner friend BUT this book never made it to the prisoner. Probably the guards thought it was a handbook of how to escape from prison! :p

Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry. Human anger does not produce the righteousness God desires. 

James 1:19-21

James shares three important keys to great relationships.
1. we need to become good listeners
2. we have to think before we open our mouth and speak
3. we need to learn to control our anger.

Human relationships are an essential part of all of our lives. They are where we experience some of our greatest joys. They are also where we sometimes experience our deepest pain. Some of that pain can be caused by uncontrolled anger.

Few general observations about anger

• we need to recognize that anger is a common emotion - like most of our emotions, anger is a warning signal that some sort of violation has taken place. We need to pay attention to it. We need to choose wisely what we do in response to our feelings of anger.
• it can cause great damage. - it is like a boomerang. We become angry at someone else but our anger affects us too.
• anger management is essential for healthy relationships. - Its important that we take control of this emotion of anger and ensure that it does not destroy people around about us. 
• there's a big difference between having angry feelings and expressing angry behaviour. - it is one thing to feel angry. It is yet another thing to then vent that anger through behaviours that hurts people.

There is a place for righteous anger. God expresses anger at times. God's anger is never irrational or as a result of impatience. His anger only last for a moment and it is always an expression of His goodness and concern. However, when God is angry, it is always for our good and so that we will return to Him. There is a big difference between angry feelings and behaviour and there is an appropriate place for righteous anger.

So how do we take control of our anger?

1.  anger triggers - look at your life and your relationships and consider what causes you to become angry. What kind of people tend to make you angry? By reflecting on our anger triggers we can seek God's help to change our responses in those particulars situations. 
2. embrace realistic expectations about life and people. - Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other's faults because of your love. 
3. choose to be a forgiving person. - forgiveness is God's antidote to all hurt. It enables us to release the person and in releasing them, we release ourselves. 

*note: me blogging about this doesn't mean that I'm without anger. It's how I found it relevant for everyone, including me. (:

Discipline, Character and Hope

Romans 5:3-5  

3 Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;4 perseverance, character; and character, hope.5 And hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.

 
When our children suffer, whether from their own bad choices or those of someone else, we want so badly to rescue them from the pain or to tell them how to avoid finding themselves in that predicament again. But, God has another plan — to perfect them through their trials. Character-building lessons are rarely learned from the triumphs of life. Rather, it is the trials in our lives that teach us how to persevere despite the pain. Taking trials away from our kids deprives them of the chance to grow, build character, and learn to hope in God.
The best character-building lessons are learned from trials. Don't inhibit your child's growth by rescuing them from or taking over difficult situations.

another month

Another month has passed and now we're entering into the mid-year. Many things had happened in the past few months. Somethings that surprises me much. Others are encouraging.

As I obverse some people, it gave me time and opportunity to take a step back from everything and to learn from their so-called-mistakes. It helped me to remember that others do take notice of every single thing we do; be it the good or the bad. Reminded me to also look at things from a different perspective.

Things in life has taken a whole new road altogether. Believing that there's a greater purpose in life because I have Him!life is truly exciting with God (:

maybe

maybe being in this situation, things gets ugly
but maybe things will turn out for the better.

maybe, just by spending time builds a life long relationship

maybe, doing what you think its right isn't the right thing to do

maybe, sharing what you're going through helps to clear some junk in you.

maybe, just maybe.
yeah maybe.

things had been ugly. things had been worst. yet, I'm still grateful that every single step has been quite a journey. It isn't over. It has never been. Its still on going. Still struggling. Still accepting. Still angry and upset.

Just waiting for that day...but I guess that day is too far away. Someone once told me, "it happened 14 years ago, and I'm still going through." What more just four years?

maybe, just maybe. there's a silver lining after the storm, right?

It's not about the money, money, money

That time of the year -  CHINESE NEW YEAR! where firecrakers and fireworks are shot up to the sky causing noise and air pollution, kids running around getting ang pau's, new clothes, new stuffs in the house, more chinese food, cookies, spring cleaning, more food, house visiting, and more food and the list goes on.

This year has been quite a quiet year. unlike those years, we used to go around houses like nonstop. But since the older generation has left, we were/are sorta lost as to where to go during the first two days. Somehow, we still managed to go houses and have great conversations and catch ups.

Lil boy is just happy he gets to go around and eat cny goodies; mainly chips and keropok and drink cold drinks. -.-

As for me, I'm glad I finally 'sau kong' on the eve of CNY but that didn't end there. We had a friend and her son over for reunion, and, yes, did cook dishes for the reunion. I WAS FLAT OUT AFTER DINS! and only woke up the next morning!.

Feeling a lil sick every morning i wake up. Find myself really tired by mid day. naps in the evening and sleeping throughout the night. I miss this. I guess the body is trying to repair and adjust itself since I've been skipping my sleep time to bake to meet the orders. hehe. 

Now that baking has stopped, I'm wondering what I'm gonna do next. Waiting for the right time to text the teacher telling him I wanna continue my Diploma. hmmmmmm..

reflections

So I was randomly having a chat with a friend few days back. At first, it was those usuals and what nots and casual and yeah you the drift. With any conversations, there tend to be a serious part and yeap, it made me think alot. Not exactly during the time we were having the conversation but more to after. Like till now, and i guess the next few days. It got me thinking like how I ended up being like that. How and why I made those decisions and that it's alright for me to be this way. Looking back right now, somehow I find it hard sharing (and holding back that water works) and explaining why I made those decisions. I literally had to have some time to refresh my memory....and now, its playing in my head and haunting me ):


I guess sometimes its good to reflect on what has happened and why you made those decisions. And it is also important that if any of those unwanted memories which suddenly pops up, I guess, one has to just cry(?), scream(?), throw knives(?), or find something that helps you to feel better. Of course, praying and know that your past just makes you stronger (:

speaking of

Busy is the word. Busy is an excuse. Busy is hated by me. Busy, keeps people away from something/someone. Busy is overrated. If only busy does not exist. If only, if only does not exist too.

Speaking of busy, yes, i've been busy (ugh) with tons of stuffs, yet again. Well maybe not a lot but i tend to find something or create havoc for myself to keep myself occupied, if you can get what I mean...? There was a week where I didn't have to cater food and I thought, oh wow, so free! but i got myself into getting some things done, which I really can't remember what was it. short-long term memory loss.

Speaking of memory loss, uhh what was I....oh yeah...What's up with cream puffs anyways? I've no idea how much a person can love cream puffs until, i met this person and she keeps going on an on about it. Seriously? If its ice-cream or scones or chocolate cake and maybe durian its okayy but cream puffs? uh okayyy maybe I should start baking cream puffs. or start eating at some classy bakery. but then, i would be put more weight. how is it possible that, that aunty is still so skinny and eating tons of cream puffs? diet????

speaking of diet, this had been, still is and still going to happen. uh, yeah tomorrow will be the official diet day or week. or, maybe never? maybe i'll just exercise my butt off.

speaking if exercise, I found a Pilates book which my dad asked me to buy FOR HIM few years back but never used it..probably he didn't even read it. what's the use of buying it anyway?. Basically its a manual on how to do Pilates from beginners to advance classes. Its kinda confusing reading it. I could understand by reading it but after some time, it gets kinda confusing or maybe i just complicate things by not paying attention while reading. Maybe I should read and do Pilates at the same time. or maybe I should see some Pilates video. or maybe i should just read....? hahaha

Speaking of reading, I've been reading books again. this time to finish the course which, i will not tell now. December is nearing. and i have to submit my paper or else, i'll never get a cert! booo hoo. mind you, i've been reading and re-read and re-read all my papers, books, stuffs for....many years till they (someone) decided not to have this kinda long distance exams anymore! ): I should burn midnight oil and read and read and read till i get sleeeeeeppppppyyy.

speaking of sleepy, I am right now. so i'm gonna stop ranting.

speaking of ranting, i really need to rant to someone.
speaking of someone, you know.. ....yeah....well..yeahh..

*sorry for wasting your life by reading my rants. If u managed to read till here, *thumbs up* and that means you really care. Awwwwww virtue hugs*

blessed

even though i do complain of not having enough and sometimes barely making it through the month, the past week has made me realized (again) how blessed I am than some others. Went for Coalition 58 and obviously there were bands played and peeps coming out and sharing what this whole thing is about. How we could help differently and stuffs. And its simple hearing stories from people how they went and visit these families and saw the desperate need in their eyes and how much they have to suffer in order to raise (the x number) their kids. Worst of all if they had a kid who is Disable, makes matter worst. Its easy to feel sorry for them. I myself have known some people who do suffer. Sometimes, in my head, i tell myself that I do not wanna be like these people. Sometimes, they didn't choose to be in such bad shape. Just that things really did not work out well.

And at many times I tell myself that in whatever I do, I must not fail. but looking back, there has been plenty of failures. But from there, that's when I have learn alot. So looking back, I have to constantly remind myself to count my blessings. To be contented with what I have even to the little things in life. To make full use of my talents and to bless others.

another month

July left. Another new month. End year is nearing. deadline is nearing. I is scared.

not recovering from every week with its events isn't happening. I am glad I had the opportunity to sleep (almost all the time) during a family getaway. but what is family time if you're sleeping all the time right? sigh.

ok this post is so depressing. out.

crazy

 At this rate, I am amazed how I can survive the many events happening. Especially when this one is running around, like he's high on some sugar, or when he's super manja, or when he just wants attention, or when he turns my room into some playground, or when he demands food which he can't eat for these three months. really, somebody please help me!

 So I went to the morning market yesterday morning and bought some fruits, bananas included. BUT yeah big butt, I forgot to take it outta the plastic bag and it was left in it till this morning. With the hot hot hot weather of Malaysia yesterday, obviously, it became too ripe! I think someone ate one or two. I was thinking of baking a banana cake so I took the butter out to soften. I had to go out, so when i came home, my mum had taken out some yogurt cause she wanted some yogurt shake! booooooo So I had less bananas for the cake. I was too lazy to google or find a banana cake recipe, so I used the Durian cake recipe, just replace the durians with bananas! As I was mixing and everything, I remember Caryn's recipe was different, had milk n all, panicked a lil but went on mixing, added some almond flakes, went into the oven and......

It'll be better if there were more bananas in it! oh wells.

Ben met this person somewhere which bakes Macaroons. He bought some and....nah

It's a lil flat. But not as flat as mine. and huge! this is so like M&M's!


As I still have some cream cheese left, I decided to make these lovelies as I've always wanted to make this for so many years but malas. Making the tart shells is so...okay la its worth making them. BUT (butt again) I should have baked the tart shells longer. The tart shell looks really pale.

I reduced the sugar and it turned out a lil salty even though I used unsalted butter (?!) Imma bake this again because I is not happy with the results. I'm gonna mix match some recipes together. (:

Day Eight

Just when I was about to type something nais in here, my mum walked passed me and commented, " Girl, i think you should cut down on eating cookies or anything you bake. Can see your tummy." thanks mummyyyyy! hello diet!


Day Eight - Your Internet Friend.

I'm not quite sure who is my internet friend cause, I know everyone, as in I've met everyone i know in the internet that's on whatever social network that is. Not a fan of knowing someone ramdomly. :P

what you want and what you need

is the same thing? NOOO!


watching alotta cartoons again. Seriously, what can you do with a child who is sick? Watch more cartoons! Let's just hope this ends quickly. I need my sleep.

a first

There's always a first. That's what they all say. They? Yeah, everyone.

Since water in my area was not disrupted, I went ahead with my plan to perfect the Focaccia and try another muffin.

 Crunchy Peanut Butter Chocolate Chip Muffin

 Focaccia with ExtraVirginOliveOil with BalsamicVinegar

Everything went well. I made them. I felt proud of myself. I felt accomplished.

But something was not right. I had never felt so horrible after baking. I do enjoy baking, really I do. But today was just different. Today just doesn't seem right. Baking does help me take my mind off and I always feel better after that but not today.

Today, maybe I shouldn't had baked. Or maybe I should, as I've already had.

Cause there's always a first. A first to feel sad even when you do the thing you love most, can't help you to feel good at all..

yes, no?

I was thinking to do that 2week challenge - less-fat cornflake thingy but then, i failed on the second day. SECOND. So maybe now I just have to resort in eating less awesome food and going for tons of exercise. ):

why does it have to be so hard to be a girl who doesn't need to diet at all? sigh. or we could just don't bother and just be happy! hahahha